Having purchased our new house, we drew up a list of the things we wanted to change. At the top of the list was the kitchen, and this photo of the original may explain why:
The kitchen was dark, and was bordered by a plasterboard wall which further blocked the light and made the kitchen area very cramped. Various designs were discussed to improve the look whilst retaining the wall; until it became obvious that the only way forward was to get rid of the wall and install an island in the kitchen to give more working space. The pieces on the floor of this photo represent our first attempts at sizing and positioning an island.
Concept in place, we headed off to find out who could build us a kitchen. This involved attending a number of kitchen providers in a number of malls and showing them our basic ideas and floor space. They would then take these ideas and produce a recommendation that bore little relation to what we wanted and provided no detail as to what was inside the various proposed cabinets. Naturally I had questions, and naturally she who must be obeyed had to relay them to the kitchen purveyor in Thai and then translate back the answers. She became a little weary of doing this; or as she described it later “I wanted to eat your head” (this is not a good thing).
Eventually we found somewhere that was prepared to give us a catalogue of available kitchen units. We then spent many happy evenings putting these together into the semblance of a design…. Actually, it wasn’t quite like that. She who must be obeyed spent several happy evenings trawling the web for photos of white, and inevitably expensive, kitchens in exotic locations; which she would then pass to me to include in the design, with a look of expectation on her face, mingled with the weary knowledge that I would probably say “no”. I became a little tired of this process and understood what “I want to eat your head” actually feels like.
Still, eventually we had a design which had very little in common with the photo of a millionaire’s seven zillion square foot kitchen in the mountains of Colorado my wife had passed me; but it did reflect what was available in the catalogue and it would fit in a small space in a home in Pattaya.
Before passing it to the kitchen company’s designer, we needed one more measurement; the size of the hole required to accommodate the new fridge we hadn’t bought yet. So off round the malls again to look at fridges, most of which are silver-grey and rounded in profile; whereas our (her) requirement was for something flat and white. Samsung had a suitable model which was jammed on a stand with other fridges so it was impossible to check on the cooling space required. A young man with a Samsung jacket was cornered who explained that this was a new model which did not require cooling space at the rear but required 5cm on each side for venting. Failing to spot the ignorance and indifference in his voice; we believed him and designed the space accordingly. Naturally enough, once the fridge arrived we discovered that it needed cooling space at the rear but could be placed hard against kitchen units on the side… And so the world turns.
Anyway, we had our (incorrect) measurements and we passed our hopes and dreams to the designer who, after showing how some of our ideas would not work; came up with something acceptable.
Kitchen ordered, there were just a few outstandings. What handles to chose, what colour and material for the worktop, what sink, what faucet, and what tiles to use for the backdrop? All these were decided by she who must be obeyed in no time at all (about a week); although for completeness I have to mention that once construction was finished she decided she didn’t like the tiles so they were ripped out and replaced. Oh, and the faucet looked cool but was so high that it sprayed the living room every time you turned it on; so that had to be replaced with something that looks like a sex toy but isn’t (unless you are really inventive).
Anyway, back to the construction phase. With the kitchen ordered, our general contractor was tasked with providing a water and electricity supply to a point on the floor of the kitchen where the island would reside. The opportunity for fucking this up was immense; but he was spot on.
He also moved electrical points around on the wall without blowing anything up, and we waited for the arrival of the kitchen.
Come the day, a lorryload of Danish flatpacks arrived, together with two installers who looked a little baffled by the enormity of the task in front of them.
The projected two day install extended, in fits and starts, for about a week; and then a little longer as assorted missing components arrived and were fitted. Then we had the tiling replacement job and the rerouting of the extractor exhaust via the ceiling (rather than having the silver extractor pipe lying along the top of the units which did not meet my wife’s standards). Finally it is finished, apart from shining up the extractor vent which is waiting for the some silicone sealing before a final clean:
The removal of the wall has opened up the living area too.
My wife is delighted with it; and I have to admit that her constant nagging of me and various contractors to arrive at the finished product she wanted has paid off. Although I would never tell her that to her face; she might eat my head.
Comments 🔗
2014-09-20| Camberley saysLooks wonderful
2014-09-20| Digbats saysSWMBO thinks like a Praying Mantis - be careful during the mating season!
;-)
2014-09-21| Grant saysAbsolutely stunning. Well done! Do you think heads are eaten raw or cooked…?
2014-09-21| Chang Noi saysLooks great, but where is the smelling food made for SWMBO?
2014-09-21| Spike saysRaw, with chili sauce.
2014-09-21| Spike saysThe previous owner built a large Thai kitchen outside the back door. So she has two kitchens to choose from.
2014-09-21| Spike saysA mating season is but a distant memory for a man of my vintage,
2014-09-21| Grant saysDistant but happy, happy…
2014-09-21| Grant saysYou’re a brave mon McTennyson, fain I’d prefer mine cooked…
2014-09-21| rjmorgans saysGreat blog and lovely read. Keep it up!
2014-09-23| Pete saysFaucet ??? I had this strange idea that you were English, albeit from those North-Eastern climes where they speak funny.
2014-09-24| Spike saysMonths of trawling round kitchen salerooms have perverted me, bonny lad.
2014-09-26| Parry saysWhat a $hithole.
2014-09-26| Spike saysIn our house, we don’t have a shithole in the kitchen. Instead there are be the bathrooms; renovated at vast expense using tiny “handmade” ceramic tiles which filled the contractor with gloom for several days as he tried to fit them together.
2014-09-26| Parry saysIt looks stunning old boy. I will one day post a photo of bathroom hell. You’ll know it when you see it.