There are many cultural differences between East and West, and after nearly thirty years of Asian living, I think I have adopted many Eastern practices to the extent that they now come naturally. But I have yet to adopt the practice of spraying my bum, post poo.
Of course it makes sense. Is it better to slide your fingers over your dirty bum, protected only by a thin piece of tissue paper, or spray it clean with a jet of water. The latter obviously; but my inability to use a bum spray without also soaking a wide area of my body, my clothes, the toilet and surrounding facilities; means I continue to consume toilet tissue.
Not so my wife, who wields a bum spray with the dexterity of an expert surgeon with a scalpel; not that I have ever watched either in action. And, after years of heavy use, her bum spray was staring to leak and I was tasked with procuring a new one.
This meant a trip to a hardware store. My usual destination is Home Works, best known for its massive over-staffing and abysmally low stocking levels. Having suffered there before, I decided to try pastures new and ventured south to Thai Watsadu. This is a new outlet, owned by Central Group, and replacing the Kanyong store which was on a par with Home Works but was further to travel.
Watsadu is much more pleasant. Well lit, well stocked, and with staffing levels that don’t make you feel you have somehow been dropped into a refugee camp full of teeth-picking layabouts. I was able to browse without being hassled, found an aisle full of bum sprays, and my only employee interface experience was when a smiling young man presented me with a basket to carry my new spray. Good times. In fact I enjoyed myself so much that I wandered around for a while more, and came away with a new garden hose (oh, the indulgence, especially as I don’t have a garden).
Of course it all went to ratshit at the only available check-out where they discovered my new hose had no bar-code and one of the few available employees was sent ambling off to get the price while a substantial queue built up behind me. Still, nine out ten for Watsadu and I will be back, perhaps to buy myself a new toilet roll holder; why should my wife get all the new things?
Comments 🔗
2014-01-16| ivo saysNo photo?
2014-01-16| Spike saysBe careful what you wish for….
2014-01-16| Ivo saysI was thinking of a close-up of …. water drops on …. a bum spray. What were you thinking that I was thinking?
2014-01-16| genuinej saysAll may not be lost, not having a garden for your new garden hose. With an appropriate nozzle, it could double as a back-up bum spray.
2014-01-16| Spike saysSharp thinking! Or a particularly invigorating enema.
2014-01-16| Spike saysNo idea, but I know what I was thinking.
2014-01-16| Ron saysI installed a bum sprayer here at my apartment. Sold here as a bidet for the ladies. Turned the valve down for appropriate pressure and am a happy camper. They are especially nice when the poo is a little loose.
2014-01-17| Andrew saysAh, you could have sprung ( with your probably now even better exchange rate pension ) for a Toto Washlet where you could not only have water but blood pressure monitor ( and perhaps stool sample fibre content analysis and maybe even a fortune cookie spit out- haven’t quite kept up with their advances ) and left your hands free to wield the EM-1….time to admit it - you sampled the dark side when you were in Japan didn’t you….????
2014-01-17| Andrew saysOn the other hand if you find the location somewhat restrictive you can also spring for : http://www.newsytype.com/12481-toilet-bike-neo-biogas/ now you shoot the critters AND get back home….