She who must be obeyed is often stuck in traffic on her way home; and to amuse herself she calls me up for a chat. The topic for last night’s conversation was surprising.
I’ve just seen a very interesting thing on Facebook, it’s all about vaginas!
(Hesitantly) Oh really?
Yes, this artist in the UK took women’s vanginas and covered them in…I know the Thai word but not the English…you know, that white sticky stuff.
(Sure that the obvious answer was not the right one, I needed clarification) Tell me more.
It dries and you have a cast of the vagina.
Plaster?
Yes, plaster! Anyway, this artist has made plaster casts of four hundred women and hung them on the wall. He calls it The Great Wall of Vagina.
Fascinating.
And they all look so different! Has that been your experience? (My wife is convinced I was a playboy, with a babe attending to every orifice in the years before we met. Sadly, not true).
I have insufficient data to comment. (Diplomatic I thought).
Anyway, when is it right to say “vagina” and when should you say “pussy”?
At last we were back on familiar ground, she who must be obeyed’s continuing search for the correct use of English; although this was a rather unusual example. I gave it my best shot.
You probably wouldn’t use either in normal conversation.
What if we went out for dinner and I wanted to tell everyone I had an itch on my pussy?
Please, never ever do that. But the polite thing to do might be to point in the general direction and tell everyone you have a “ladies problem”. The really polite thing to do would be to not mention it at all.
Well, what if I went to the doctor?
Well, vagina would be the correct medical term to use.
So, a doctor would always say vagina and not pussy?
That is correct.
(Long pause while she considered a response).
Unless he owned a cat.
Once again my wife fulfilled her dual role of making me laugh and always having the last word.
Comments 🔗
2013-02-11| Grant saysJamie McCartney must have the pick-up line the rest of us have never found. Little bastard…
2013-02-11| Spike saysGood point. How many women would you have to walk up to and say “Hi, I’m Grant and I would like to make a plaster cast of your vagina” in order to have 400 say “yes”.
And for a bonus point: Are there that many women on the planet.
2013-02-11| genuinej saysThere are certainly enough c***s. In Parliament alone!
2013-02-11| sproggit saysWay, way off topic, but have you seen the latest GX2 story over on 43rumors.com?
On balance I do hope that it proves to be off target… Whilst the inclusion of integrated digital eyepiece makes for a more compact solution, I have come to value the ability to rotate the GX1 unit to the vertical, especially for tripod work…
Interesting but not unexpected to see no change in sensor size, but I wonder if it is the same model as the GX1 or something closer to Spike’s shiny new Olympus?
For me, though, the real tipping point might be better continuous shooting and a tracking AF capability. But only because that would enable me to sell all my 7D gear…
2013-02-11| Sproggit saysAlmost related in a truth-is-stranger-than-fiction kind of way. In his autobiography, “Surely You’re Joking, Mr Feynman”, physicist Richard Feynman tells of his experiences working for the US Government during the Second World War. Let off base once per week with his motley crew of soldiers and scientists, Feynman developed this technique for chatting up women which consisted of him walking up to one in a bar and saying something along the lines of, “So, if I were to buy you a couple of drinks and maybe dinner, what’s the chance of me taking you to bed afterwards?” Whilst he did suffer slightly more aggressive rejections than more subtle approaches, he apparently had the best success rate of any scientist at Los Alamos during the war…
Darned good read, if ever you’re so inclined, and if you can find a copy…
2013-02-12| Spike saysPopular in the clubs of my youth was: Do you want to dance? No. Don’t suppose there is any chance of a shag then?
2013-02-12| Spike saysFT2 rumours are very unreliable; but it reckons the sensor is from the GH3 which is very good. Doubt you will see an improvement in tracking, next generation.
2013-02-12| Grant saysWere you heartily slapped, or just treated with the cold disdain you so richly deserved…? Of course had you been like wee Jamie Mac and mentioned “art” you may have struck as high as 10% but I’m reliably informed, and I never had the guts to try it, that pretending to be gay took you up to about the 80% mark…
2013-02-12| Spike saysThis is what I heard, not how I behaved of course. I would present young ladies of apparently good breeding with a white rose and ask them if they would like to come and meet my parents.
Got me nowhere.
2013-02-12| Jock saysIn those days the ladies used to wear tight pants. Mate of mine thought he was being smart says ´How do you manage to get into these pants´. Her reply ´you can start by buying me a Gin & Tonic´. The quines were as bad, if not worse, than the loons in those good old days. My research to date has not found any 2 vaginas to be exactly the same …
2013-02-12| Grant says…and I’ve been drinking G&T ever since. Cheers! Jock I’m very interested in your research, you are to be applauded for your dedication and it would seem that wee Jamie Pratt-Plaster has possibly reached the same conclusion by now…