The word “seminar” was always a popular trigger when I was in mildly gainful employment. This usually meant a trip, with all the opportunities for shopping, drinking and maximising expenses that that entailed; with the only small downside of having to sit in a room for a few hours whilst some idiot droned on about a topic which had little relevance to the real world of business, but had somehow been identified as flavour of the week by management and therefore worthy of attention. I remember “Quality Circles” being popular for a while, and “diversity” was also good for a few beers. All a total wank of course, but if they were paying, I was prepared to sacrifice their time and attend.
Yesterday I saw a new word: “webinar”. The downside of a webinar is that you don’t travel to it, it comes to you courtesy of the wide wide world of web. Topaz were running one last night at 2300, the subject being an introduction to their B&W Effects, so I signed up and they sent me a link.
Prompt at 2300, I clicked on the link and was surprised to see someone else’s computer screen pop up on my monitor and a charming lady started to demonstrate the product. As she talked, we could type in questions which she answered at the end of the event. It was rather strange to hear her say “and we have an interesting question from Spike…”, partially because I was here and she was in California and the whole thing was working a charm in spite of the Thai internet, and also because I am not known for my interesting questions.
Anyway, an hour well spent. Could have taken less than an hour had she used a computer as fast as mine; but then, she was using Windows. I will be looking out for more webinars to attend, perhaps this one on diversity where I can “see the perspective of the diversity advantage”. Still a total wank then.
One of the things the nice lady told me last night that I should have known, but didn’t because I am not 150 years old, is that many of the presets in B&W Effects are trying to replicate film photography techniques. Opalotype, for example was the process of printing on opaque white glass rather than photo paper. Out of favour for more than eighty years, you can now replicate the effect in your computer.
Suitably enthused, I wandered round a shopping centre this morning while she who must be obeyed went to the post office, and came home and knocked out this:
Webinars and opalotype on your computer, isn’t technology wonderful?
Comments 🔗
2011-09-03| genuinej saysThanks for the reminder of the bullshit left behind at retirement. I had hoped never to hear again of the bollocks that was TQM, OK Corral, Investors in Industry etc. and that time would eliminate such crap, but a visit to the Diversity Training site shows that it is apparently still thriving. The content of the paragraph headed “Solution” is a cracking example of consultant speak/shite.