Billy time

I have known Billy for more than thirty years. I don’t recall our first encounter, but it was probably in the bar in the office in Aberdeen. Back in the swinging seventies, it was not unusual for a company to have a pub for employees on the premises; and Shell in Aberdeen had a very good one (i.e. subsidised). Being a loyal employee, I felt it was my duty to frequent the bar after work so I could get tanked up before attempting to drive home.

Apart from propping up the bar together, we also did some work; but I don’t recall much about that. Then I left for Holland and our paths were not to cross again other than meeting, usually at the bar, at various company conferences. But I kept up with Billy’s life, because he was a blogger before blogs had been invented. His time in Angola, for example, was recorded in a series of publications entitled “Out of Africa” which were as amusing as you might imagine from a Liverpudlian trying to live a civilised life in Luanda.

Eventually there was the Billy The Brush blog; and it was my guest editing of same for a month that persuaded me to start up my own effort.

So when Billy descended on Pattaya from Jakarta for a few days of golf; we had to meet up. We decided that it was at least thirteen years since we had last met; but, courtesy of our respective blogs, there was not much catching up to do in respect of news. Instead we trawled the murkier parts of our respective histories, discussed the challenges and delights of being married to Asian women, and had a couple of beers.

After a fine dinner at Mum Aroi in Naklua, we took a stroll down Walking Street and played “spot the trannie” for a while. I then walked Billy back to his hotel, so as to protect him from the phalanx of hookers on beach road. There was only one incident; a young lady of the night approached me and whispered: “You sexy man, where you go, I go with you, but can you lose your Dad ‘cos he looks a bit smelly?” Fortunately, Billy did not catch the conversation so there was no embarrassment.

Good to see you Billy, same again next year?

Comments 🔗

2011-04-22 | TheSon says

She said the same thing to me when we were there last week badum-tish etc

2011-04-22 | Spike says

Good luck getting back from the airport, and finding accommodation.

2011-04-22 | Wally says

Best chuckle I’ve had for a while, well said The Son. Dad’s reply was pretty damn good too. What a great relationship you two must have.

2011-04-22 | TheSon says

Look for our new comedy sketch show and hip-hop rap battle DVD, “Like Father? Like TheSon! Super Laughing Time Rhyme-Off Badum-Tish Etc”, out now on Region 6 Limited Release at all good DVD piracy stalls and in the Music section of PirateBay.org

2011-04-23 | Billy the Brush says

In my few days in Pattaya, I was in fact able to assimilate rather more of the Thai language than Your Spikeness has managed in more than 13 years. I am therefore in a much better position to tell you what she actually said was “is that your son, he is quite gorgeous, can I give him a free one?”

Unfortunately for you, Thai is a most complex “tonal” language where subject, object and even action can be easily mistaken by the linguistically challenged such as your goodself. Hope helpful.

PS Many thanks for a most excellent meal in pleasant surroundings with barely a tattooed, fat bellied expat in sight to tell me what a fucked up country the place is as his little Thai girl friend orders her tenth “Lady Drink”

PPS still not 100% convinced on your role in the Mary Muldoon episode.