Both sexes have afflictions they could do without. Women have a monthly event which I prefer not to consider in too much detail; but I know that it makes she who must be obeyed a little grumpy for a day or so; and she complains about back pains; but then women are so weak compared to us men. They even moan about popping out an occasional baby, how hard can that be? You should see what I delivered to the toilet bowl last week; or perhaps you shouldn’t.
Anyway, all this female stuff is of nothing compared to the rigours of man flu. Women may get the occasional head cold, but we guys really suffer; and I am suffering now.
A sweaty day in Dan Sai, a long drive home in an air-conned car and extreme tiredness all conspired to deliver a sniffle, a sore throat and a general feeling of misery. Within a couple of days the whole thing had made the journey to my lungs where it currently sits, leaving me hacking like a twenty a day man and unable to sleep properly. I am not a happy Spike.
Still, every cloud etc. and she who must be obeyed has moved into full Florence Nightingale mode and has been administering assorted potions and tenderness, just the sort of sympathy that the rigours of man-flu demand. On the downside I have been banned from cold drinks, ice lollies and chocolate; all of which are apparently bad for me. Not sure about the chocolate embargo, but she “read it on the web” so it must be true. When I go to bed I have vapour rub applied to the soles of my feet and then I have to wear socks. I am not sure whether this “cure” came from the internet or a mad auntie; but her heart is in the right place and I love her for caring.
So, the inherent male need for sympathy and attention in times of chronic illness (Ed: stop exaggerating) is being attended to. But I still have to keep myself amused in my weakened state, which can be summarised as “slumped”.
Most of the day is spent in an easy chair. My only responsibility is to emit a low groan on a regular basis to ensure that SWMBO realises the extend to which I am suffering. Other than dozing, which I am rather good at, I direct a rather reduced attention span to the iPad. I have read the latest issue of Rolling Stone which contains a very interesting article about the oil spill. BP may have screwed up; but the American government did little to stop them. There have been a few Angry Bird gaming sessions where I have tried and failed to gain three star status on level 2-12 (trust me, this if important; I have to get there before SWMBO). But mainly I have been playing Carcassonne.
Carcassonne is a fortified town in France. Then, in 2000, a German decided to invade it that it would be a good name for a board game, and now it is available on the iPhone, iPad and Xbox. The rules are extremely simple. You draw a tile and place it on the board. The tile may contain a piece of a city, road, farm or a combination of these. You place the tile so it matches against other tiles; and then optionally you can place one of your followers on either the city, road or farm section of the tile. You only have a few followers and they will not be returned to you during the game unless you complete a city or road. When all the tiles have been laid the scores are added up and I lose.
The rules are simple, but the strategic options are many, and the computer opponents, even at the easy level, are too good for me. Optionally, I could find human opponents on-line; but I am not ready for the inevitable humiliation that would follow (see previous reference to weakened state).
Well, typing all that has worn me out. Off for another “see how easy it is to have a baby” demonstration in the toilet and then a little sleep perhaps. Later I am going to sneak out to 7/11 and get some chocolate.If SWMBO is correct, I expect my condition will worsen by the morning.
Comments 🔗
2010-06-20| roman169 saysCarcassonne: Gave up on this one - picked up Tiger Woods Golf for USD 0,99. Good value.
2010-06-20| Craig saysYou missing out on nice afternoon wind here. Windsurfers out in force and loving it.
Get well soon and join us for SUP Surf Trip to Rayong on Tuesday!
2010-06-20| genuinej saysHave you really got man flu, or is it just a lame excuse for reduced output?
2010-06-20| Spike saysSend me a box and I’ll send it back full of snot and phlegm.
2010-06-20| genuinej saysUgh! (what sort of box do you have in mind?)
2010-06-20| Spike saysHave to be a large one.
2010-06-21| Mountain Bike saysI was wondering.. Can you reccomend me a good start level mouintainbike?
2010-12-15| watch online info saysWow this site has been amazing. Great efforts and/and also maintain the good work. Kudos for the post this works for us
2010-12-16| Billy the Brush saysDear mouintainbike (sic)… I would suggest that one with stabilisers would be the most appropriate level for you to start with … and preferably with a built in spell checker ….