When I stopped working I was presented with a bundle of cash and a pension. My bank wasted no time in advising me on how to invest the bundle of cash in a manner that would earn them maximum commissions. The investments did quite well for me for a while too, although now they are worth what is known in banking terms as “bugger all”.
Still, the bank insists on providing me with a personal adviser who calls me up to introduce himself, does nothing for a year or so, and is then re-assigned to some other cushy position where he can sit behind a desk and persuade punters to invest their cash in hopeless schemes.
My new adviser called me yesterday. He was pleasant enough and we wasted five minutes while I recounted my personal circumstances which he would fail to write down, thus requiring me to repeat myself, yet again, next year, when his successor arrives. We arrived at the subject of family and for some reason he wanted to know what my son did. I told him, and illustrated his profession by explaining that he had worked on Grand Theft Auto 4. Maybe my banker had heard of the game?
Not only had he heard of it, he was a huge fan. He had played every iteration of the game all the way through. He couldn’t wait to tell his friends that he had a client who had a son who had worked on the game. He was going straight home to boot up the game and look for my son’s name in the credits. At last, he could die happy.
Actually, he didn’t say that last bit about dying happy; but he did become very enthused and excited in the way that bankers normally don’t. We ended the conversation with a discussion on when the next downloadable content for GTA4 would be available, rather than discussing how I could maximise the returns on my investments in these troubled times. At last, a banker with appropriate priorities; I hope he stays for more than a year.
Comments 🔗
2009-05-02| The Son saysWoohoo! Can you pass on his details so he can be an enthusiastic reference on my CV?
2009-05-02| Spike saysHe gave his name as Balkan Mickey, but I suspect that may not be what is on his business card.