My mother-in-law loves me

It’s been a tough three weeks for she who must be obeyed.

Spending half her life at work, and then coming home and tending to my every whim as I played (and secretly enjoyed) the role of a sick man who needed constant attention, has resulted in a very tired lady.

But yesterday I felt confident enough with my sense of balance to shower and dress myself, was able to walk out at lunchtimes and find some food, and even drove the car for a while. My independence is returning which takes the load off my wife and I could see her starting to relax a little.

Then her mother called.

Her mother likes me, for reasons that are not clear. We speak different languages and I am sure I am less Thai and more aged than she would like. But she has always been lovely with me, and when she heard about my accident she sent a series of emergency relief parcels. First there were the herbal pills, then there was the herbal oil. Finally there was a box of herbal poultices which had to be heated and then applied to the skin which had first been treated with the herbal oil.

The oil/poultice thing was of limited benefit, but it felt good and smelled fragrant, so she who must be obeyed gave me a single treatment; but once was enough.

But mother was calling to check that my wife had been giving me the poultice/oil thingie on a daily basis. When she who must be obeyed revealed that she had only used it once, mother gave her a very hard time. Perceived wifely duties were restated with some firmness, and at length. By the time she who must be obeyed came off the phone she looked like she had been the subject of considerable verbal assault.

She looked at me and asked, with a mystified look on her face: “what the hell did you do to my mother”? And then “take your clothes off”. Sadly the latter was only to administer the oil/poultice session, after which she was back on the phone to Mum to report actions taken.

I must have a word with mother regarding her daughter’s lack of ability in mixing a gin and tonic.

Comments 🔗

2008-11-15 | Billy says

I find Asians rather touchingly unable to tell those small and useful white lies in family circumstances, especially to their mothers. This is not something with which Europeans appear burdened and saves a lot of grief though, admittedly making life rather more complicated by requiring them to be remembered.

2008-11-15 | Spike says

Indeed. I did suggest to she who must be obeyed that we just lie to her Mum and tell her I am getting the treatment every day. Totally unacceptable apparently.

2008-11-15 | Jock says

Ah just knew that OA was too good to be true .. can’t make a proper G+T eh?

2008-11-15 | Hoo Don says

Could you translate this into Thai and give it to she who must be obeyed.

1 Place ice cubes into a highball glass 2 Slowly pour gin over the ice 3 Add a lemon slice 4 Fill with tonic water 5 Stir once anti clockwise,let it settle,stir twice clockwise 6 Add a swizzle stick 7 Walk over to your husband,hold the glass up high and in a Michael Caine/Jackie Chan hybrid voice repeat the following “Who says I can’t make a bloody gin and tonic” 8 Knock it back in one

2008-11-16 | Spike says

I told her that three times clockwise was too much.

Some clarification on number 8; who knocks it back in one?

2008-11-16 | Hoo Don says

He/She who sows the seeds reaps the harvest.