Not me, obviously; she who must be obeyed is my main source of amusement (well, it’s almost a dead heat between her and my iMac); and I love her dearly. And she tells me more than once daily that she feels the same. In between telling me what to do of course.
But clearly there are some Thai ladies out there who are need of advice on how to terminate their marital arrangements, because the rather badly written and consistently sensational Pattaya Daily News has published an article entitled How To Tell Your Farang Husband You Want A Divorce.
The first suggestion is to think about all the ways in which your husband is crap and then write them down. Practice reading this list to a friend and then read it to your husband. Use your friend as a guidance counsellor, so you can tell your husband he is crap in stereo.
After all this preparatory work, the article then expertly focuses in on the real hard facts of how to tell your husband you want a divorce. The explanation, obviously based on considerable research and field tests across the Asian region, is so useful that I am going to produce it in full here:
Simply tell your spouse that you want a divorce, say, “I want a divorce.”
Economical, brilliant, effective; if only this had been known earlier.
But the real gem is hidden away in the tips section at the bottom of the page:
Don’t shoot him because you will end up paying a lot of money to the police and left you nothing.
Note that it doesn’t say “don’t shoot him because it is a crime and you will spend the rest of your life in jail for murder.” Instead it highlights the more likely outcome, that the boys in brown will demand all of your very ex-husband’s cash to keep you out of prison; and all of his cash was the real reason you were trying to divorce him in the first place.
The alternative approach, which is becoming increasingly popular, is to get someone else to shoot him. Saves making the “why you are crap” list too.
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2008-11-26| Divorce Tips Aside, Guns Still Option for Unhappy Thai Brides at The FARANG Speaks 2 Much says[…] and you will spend the rest of your life in jail for murder,’ pointed out happily married Spike at Pattaya Days. “Instead it highlights the more likely outcome, that the boys in brown will demand all of […]