Lusting for big tools

(Sorry about the title, but it does attract the punters).

When I first came to Thailand it was hard to find a home improvement store. The poor Thais had the family hammer, and the rich Thais employed the poor Thais to use their family hammer for whatever handyman jobs were required (the results were not always impressive). But the emergence of a Thai middle class, with their own homes and a need to fix things without calling in the man with the hammer, meant that various stores with the word “home” in the title started to appear.

Now we have Home Pro and Home Mart and Home Works and Home Ophobia (although the latter has an irrational fear of displaying big tools). These are OK for most supplies, but if you are looking for serious tools, and we all need them sometimes, then you have to make the pilgrimage to True Value on Sukhumvit road.

True Value is somewhat of a misnomer, True Extortion might be more appropriate. This shop specialises in imported goods, mainly from America, and it is not cheap. This may explain why I have never seen more than two other customers in the shop when I have visited; and usually, like today, I am the sole browser.

But if you want a tool that will actually work rather than collapsing at the first sign of a job, this is the place to come. I was looking for something in particular. After the near-tragedy of the dropped lens, I had not been able to unscrew the broken filter ring. I could take into Canon in Bangkok and leave it with them for a week or so, but surely this is something I could manage myself with the right tool?

After twenty minutes wandering around the aisles, during which time I was tempted by a number of impressive machines, few of which I understood and none of which I would ever use, I selected a circular wrench device with a wallet-punishing price tag and strolled to the cashier. Of course, in a shop devoid of customers apart from me, the cashier had gone for a lie-down somewhere and had to be woken from her slumbers. But the guard gave me a nice salute on the way out and assorted staff waved goodbye; I expect my visit had been the high point of the day, which would not make for a good day for anyone.

Back home, I mount the lens on a camera, strap my big tool to the filter housing, and heave. Nothing.

I sit on the camera body and jam my leg against the wall for more purchase, and heave. Nothing. The tool grips OK, but it appears that the body of the lens is willing to explode before it will let go of the filter housing.

The new tool goes in the box with all the other fancy tools that have been used once, usually without success, and then discarded. The lens awaits a trip to Bangkok. Still, the purchase did justify me writing “big tools” in the post title, which is bound to be good for the viewing figures.

Comments 🔗

2008-08-28 | Billy says

I keep all my failed experiments in a box. I call it my failed experiment box. It became so full of my follies recently that I bought another, identical one, from IKEA. I call them my failed experiment boxes. If you are interested then I will send you a photo of them.

2008-08-28 | Spike says

Yes please. And I promise not to publish. cough