Bus drivers are bastards. On a two lane highway in the countryside, it is not unusual to discover that your lane is occupied by an oncoming bus, overtaking traffic, travelling in excess of 120 kph, and with the driver having no intention of moving his bus back into the correct lane any time soon. You have the choice of heading for the side of the road in a hurry, or driving head-on into the many-wheeled beast. If you take the latter option you would have the pleasure, for a brief moment, of seeing the driver exiting his windscreen with a bemused expression on what remains of his face. The downside would be that your cranium would then, nano-seconds later, be buried under a few tonnes of bus. Clearly I have yet to exercise this option, but I have asked my internet service provider to advise you when I do. There will be photos, but not for the squeamish.
The only positive thing I can find to say about bus drivers is that, during breaks from trying to maim and destroy on the roads, they whip out some paint and create works of art on the body panels of their buses. Usually a single bus is uniquely painted, but today there was a whole fleet of the monsters reflecting a theme. Not sure what the theme was, I’ll call it Japanese Ninja Dragon Hero Igushi; seems about right.
If you chose the confrontational option in a game of chicken against one of these buses, the last thing you would see would be a colourful graphic of Japanese Ninja Dragon Hero Igushi. Not as fulfilling as a anatomically accurate rendition of a naked Jessica Alba; but better than a rusty Isuzu badge and some partially scraped-off roadkill.
Talking of roadkill, This bus appeared to have assorted dead animals hanging across the inside of the windscreen to obscure the view of the driver as he bears down upon you.
Talking of a naked Jessica Alba, I think I need to go now and do some Googling. Or should that be go ogling?