Car wash day. Something I used to enjoy doing myself on a Sunday morning in cooler climes, but in Thailand this is definitely a task to be sub-contracted. Given that all you need to set up a car wash business is a small piece of land, a supply of water and some lads with semi-clean rags; there is a plentiful supply of establishments, all eager to throw water over your car.
Sadly they all have one thing in common; give them your car for forty minutes and they will bugger it up. The only driving that needs to be done is to move the car about three metres from the parking bay to the washing area, and then back again. Apparently this cannot be accomplished unless the seat is adjusted to suit the invariably midget sized individual tasked with moving the cars. He also finds it necessary to adjust both wing mirrors and the central rear view mirror. The radio must be re-tuned to a station playing Thai country music and the volume must be left on full to amuse the owner when he returns to the car and is blasted back in his seat when he turns on the ignition. I have even had the steering column height adjusted on occasions.
Still, it’s good to know that the boys are sitting comfortably when they drive my car for ten seconds, and it only takes me for ever to put it all back to my settings again once they are done. And in their favour, I must admit they do an excellent job. Every piece of the exterior is gleaming and the inside smells like a cheap Turkish brothel (someone told me how they smell); but at least it is clean. And the cost for this wash and tidy-up is around 140 baht (US$4). What a rip-off, I could buy five substantial meals for that.